breech birth journal
Wednesday
38.5 weeks pregnant.
Ran some errands in town with my husband. We walked home and up Jacob’s Ladder (111 steps!) singing “1, 2, 3, 4…hit it 1, 2, 3, 4….go faster 2, 3, 4…keep going 2, 3, 4!”
I wanted to do loads of jobs and had a huge “nesting” energy that afternoon. I swept the garden and had visions of making kimchi so bought all of the ingredients. I went into labour that evening, so my mother in law ended up making it for us when she visited after our baby was born!
I planted wildflower seeds but didn’t get round to planting the left over seeds from our wedding flowers so did this with our baby when he was 12 days old. I wore him in the wrap on my chest and we did some gardening together.
I had a bath in the evening and went to bed to get an early night. I had a premonition but didn’t mention anything to my husband as he had an important deadline the following evening. I remember thinking “hold on one more day, little one!”. He was working late and came to bed around midnight.
Thursday
01:15 I woke up as my waters broke. It was the “Hollywood gush”!!! I woke up my husband to let him know and said “Um, I’m ever so sorry to wake you up but my waters have broken and I think we need to change the sheets”.
I had a shower and we decided to try and go back to sleep until the morning to get some good rest.
No chance of going back to sleep! Contractions started around 15 minutes later. Around 5-10 minutes apart for a couple of rounds, then it amped up to 3-4 contractions every 10 minutes. Time to call the midwife!
We were looked after by the chief midwife and breech specialist at Royal Cornwall Hospital (Treliske) and she is an angel sent from above. We knew that we were expecting a breech baby from growth scans 32-36 weeks, so had been able to plan with the support of the breech specialist team at Treliske who are WONDERFUL! We had wanted a water birth at home but had to let go of this and instead plan to be on delivery suite.
My husband texted our midwife at 02:22 and she replied one minute later. She wasn’t on shift and her phone wasn’t on loud so it’s a miracle that she woke up to a text! There must have been an energy in the ether that she sensed. She rang us and I tried my best to speak to her through contractions as my husband was downstairs gathering the last bits for our hospital bag. She asked us to come straight into delivery suite.
I remember feeling worried about my husband’s important deadline. Somehow, he managed to coordinate sending an extenuating circumstances email as I was having contractions which meant that I could let go of any deadline worries and the oxytocin began flowing!
He had lit candles and brought the warm heater into the bedroom. I was most comfortable on all fours on our bed and sank into some deep breathing. Contractions became more intense and I wasn’t able to talk during surges.
My husband put some music on. I remember the first song being really rogue which made me laugh…it was Heavenly Father by Isaiah Rashad. He switched it to peaceful meditation music which was much better.
I felt suddenly sick and vomited followed by diarrhoea…my body was getting ready to make as much room as possible for baby.
He packed the hospital bag, snacks, blankets and pillows and my pregnancy yoga ball into the car at 02:45am. A group of jolly drunk students walked past and exclaimed “BOUNCY BALL!!!”. My husband explained that I was in labour and that we were off to hospital. They asked if they could help and wished us well, waved and shouted “GOOD LUCK GUYS!!!!!” as we drove off. It felt so exciting and secret to be going on such an important mission together in the middle of the night.
I had sunglasses on for the car journey to keep light levels low and minimise adrenaline. My husband put some relaxing music on and our ‘oxytocin spaceship’ drove off at high speed to hospital in Truro. He did amazing Formula 1 driving and the journey flew by in no time.
We walked into delivery suite just after 03:00. I felt like a celebrity wearing sunglasses. We went up the stairwell and I had to stop twice for contractions on the way up.
Our midwife welcomed us in and showed us to our room on delivery suite. The room was called ‘Sennen’ and is named after a beautiful place in Cornwall, Sennen Cove. There was a big panoramic photograph of Sennen Cove on the wall and it was beautiful.
The lights were low, galaxy projector was on and my husband made sure our peaceful meditation music was playing.
He didn’t have time to bring in all the snacks and supplies we had prepared and packed in case I had a long labour because things got going quite quickly.
Our midwife said “I think we are a bit beyond the point of using the birthing pool. I think your baby will be born soon.”
I was feeling sweaty but then cold then too hot and decided I needed all of my clothes off NOW! Apparently, I politely asked if that would be ok and our midwife said of course yes and to make myself comfortable.
My husband was amazing offering me things from the birthing bag we had prepared: lavender, rose, crystals, combs, water, frozen flannels etc.
He rubbed my back and talked me through it helping me to remember to breathe and visualise being in a beautiful walkway of roses. It was perfect and just what I needed.
Contractions were getting really strong and closer together.
Our midwife reminded me that gas and air was there in case I needed it. I said “yes, please” and it was fantastic!
I was vocalising and making sounds I didn’t know I could. I was meeting my deep inner self.
Our midwife was so wonderful and very reassuring. My memory is less clear as I slipped into the magic of labour land, but I remember her dropping everything to be by my side and squeeze my hand with each contraction. I squeezed her hand SO HARD!
My husband was on my other side stroking my back and reassuring me that I could do it. I remember thinking to myself “Come on you’ve got this. Let’s do it!”
I felt the pressure in my pelvis of baby moving down into the birth canal.
Our midwife left the room for a brief moment and I immediately offered my husband a go on the gas and air!
She returned to find him looking blissful and introduced us to the consultant on shift. He seemed like a nice person. I was on all fours with no clothes on having intense contractions but still tried my best to be polite and say hello! He was just stopping by to introduce himself in case things became complicated later on (which thankfully didn’t happen).
Contractions became more intense and I was encouraged to stop using gas and air and begin continuous pushing. With breech births it is important that baby’s head is born quite quickly after the hips are out – within around seven minutes – to ensure baby has enough oxygen.
Our midwife noticed that baby’s heart rate was becoming slightly elevated and so gave me an episiotomy to give baby a bit more room and to help them be born quickly. It didn’t hurt at all and I hardly noticed it happening.
I remember her saying “Beautiful! You’ve got this! Push push push push”
It felt like doing the biggest poo of my life! I pushed and pushed and pushed with all of my energy and spirit. My husband and our midwife were absolutely incredible and I felt so supported and encouraged. I was getting tired but remember thinking “I CAN DO THIS! ONE MORE BIG PUSH!!!!!”. I was using my breathing to find a rhythm and anchor myself through the last few pushes.
Suddenly baby was earth side and started crying immediately. It was a beautiful healthy baby boy. Everything else melted away as I held him close to my chest and my husband and I shared the first golden moments of his precious little life. What a miracle. Totally the coolest thing I have ever done. All of my dreams had come true.
Our midwife left us to enjoy the first few hours together as a family of three and our baby found his way up to my breast to feed. My heart was full of joy and love as we met our new little family member.
Once the umbilical cord had gone white, our midwife made the cut and our oneness became twoness. The beginning of his life and adventure as a separate little person. I will love, treasure and support him for the rest of my life.
Although we had wanted a water birth at home and we got neither of those things because baby was breech, it didn’t matter AT ALL. We had the most beautiful birth experience on delivery suite and everything I had learned through our hypnobirthing course with Emily Bray meant that we were able to stay grounded and positive throughout as plans changed. I was able to find courage and trust in my body and self as a woman.
Thank you to this Mama for sharing her experience and her personal journey notes.
